The Ultimate Survival Guide for locals, expats along with all those who have to live and assist them.

Whether you merely arrived at your own overseas posting, or really are a long time seasoned expatriate manager with numerous experience, I hope that his short paper will put a smile with your face.

Imagine that certain day out in the blue a sizable ship, bigger than one you have ever seen arrives. Big men, and strange beasts land with your land, brandishing modern weapons of mass destruction, riding intimidating four legged creatures emitting strange sounds, and demand you turn over your riches, your land, your females and children.

The conquerors are small in number, but big in power. They have superior weapons, better tactics, are better educated and built. Your numbers are larger, but they’re no match in their mind militarily. Pizarro landed around the coast of Peru in 1531 with 168 Spanish soldiers and proceeded to conquer the Inca Empire of millions.

If the foreigner’s numbers are smaller than average and they prefer to stay there for just a short time, of course, if you know that it will likely be difficult for these phones return, slowly change get as often out of them as you can. Tap into his knowledge, steal his weapons, rob his warehouses, and kill them if you possibly could.

But, in the event the newly arrived conquerors appear like they are there to settle, what now ?? You have virtually no competitive advantage on them, aside from local geographical knowledge. And time. Time is in your side. In time, foreigners come and foreigners go though the local inhabitants are there to remain. It’s always been this way, and will also always be prefer that. What do you do to live?

There are two principals who have guided conquered progressed history of their survival:

Principal One: The conqueror has absolute management of you. He can hurt/maim/kill you at any time. At a whim.
Principal Two: Under any circumstance, always remember Principal one.

Survival Guide for Conquered Peoples 101

How to thrive and outfox the foreigner until he leaves?

On Everyday Guidelines:

Smile at all times. Smiling doesn’t hurt anyone. The foreigner could even smile back. Some with the foreigners that smile back could even think which you are sincere.
The ones which are foolish enough to trust in your sincerity could possibly be cajoled into assisting you to with special favors.

Always greet the foreigner first. Greet several foreigners as you can. This will make them feel important. Since you happen to be the one that ensures they are feel important they may look out for you.

Say “yes” constantly. To anything and everything. Even when you mean “no” say “yes”. Purge the term “no” out of your vocabulary.

When asked or ordered to behave, always agree. Disagreeing could mean punishment as well as worse, instant death.

On Work or Rather On How Not to Work

Of course, agreeing to behave does not necessarily mean you will take action!

You are capable of doing the work slowly. The foreigner typically has deadlines he or she must meet in the own company/country. If you work slowly, his patience might go out. He will either make an effort to do the job himself or ask others to help you. Either way, you will get lightened your burden.

You can perform the work badly. If you can pull off it which is. But if you pull that one off one lots of times, the sofa might be for the line.

You can pretend to misunderstand orders. The simple “I no speak” said within the foreigner’s language is generally enough to own them put you from the “useless” box. If they can’t contact you, they cannot ask you to do give you results for them.

You can feign a reduction in understanding if you might be accused of not doing the assigned work. “I failed to understand” said within the foreigners language is often very effective. Sometimes the foreigner might doubt her communication skills.

Play any time game. Don’t finish the task you were given from the allocated time. Then forget about the job altogether. If prompted from the foreigner morning, week or month, that explains why you didn’t finish your projects, say “I understood that you simply only want me to figure that day”

You can also act straight out dumb.